Left In The Woods
by Daisy Langford
Summary: What happens when Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, the Frog Prince and other new beloved fairy tale characters are left in the Woods and have to confront a menopausal witch? Presented in the true spirit of Into the Woods which I do not own as a play with original songs.


**Left in the Woods**

**Act One Scene One**

**Stage set up**

_Stage dark. Three spotlights come on. Forest scenery backdrop stretches across back of stage. Far right spotlight shows Sleeping Beauty angrily pouting as she sits on a large boulder. She is 18 years old with brown hair wearing a slightly torn, wrinkled long gown or dress. _

_Middle spotlight shows the Woodcutter chopping wood with his axe with a pile of chopped logs next to him. The Woodcutter is at least 35 years old and wearing brown pants tucked into boots and a brown or black shirt with long full sleeves, front tied up with leather strips if available. _

_Far left spotlight shows Snow White sitting on the ground humming to unseen birds in the sky. Snow White is in her early to mid twenties and dressed in Disney-like attire always seen on this character. _

_Far right in front of stage is the Narrator and next to her is a metal folding chair facing the audience. This time the Narrator is an older woman, 50+ years old. A no nonsense type, all business-like, in two piece business suit or dress with long sleeved jacket. She is holding a script._

Narrator - "Once upon a time there was a prince, a wolf, a cow and a group of people who went into the woods. Each had their own reasons, their own quests, their own secrets. But once in the woods they met each other, they met a witch, they met up with Giants. Most of all they met themselves. Some bad people died, some nice ones, too. Those who lived, they learned and changed. And working together they tamed the witch and slew the Giants. And now that story is done and they have left the woods, gone home and lived happily ever after. Good night." _Narrator_ _turns to leave the stage._

Sleeping Beauty - "Wait!" _she stands up waving arms_ "You can't go now!"

Narrator - "Sorry, Sleeping Beauty, but everyone else has left."

Sleeping Beauty - "But you can't leave. It's not fair. All I got was one brief mention at the end. That's it! Then the Prince left me, they all left me here in the woods just as I woke up! You cannot leave me, too!"

_Sleeping Beauty leans out and to the right and looks over to Snow White, ignoring the Woodcutter who is now standing between them, leaning on his axe watching them._

Sleeping Beauty_ - _"Hey you, bird girl!"

Snow White -_ startles and looks around not sure who called her. She seems to talk to the birds for a moment then stands up and looks over at Sleeping Beauty and the Narrator who are staring at her. She points to herself as if to ask if Sleeping Beauty was talking to her._

Sleeping Beauty - "Yeah you, Snow White! Don't you agree with me? The other Prince Charming brother left you, didn't he? They got three whole hours to tell their stories and we get, what? A few toss mentions in a song at the end for laughs. And now we've been left here in the woods, alone, after everyone else has gone home? Now how fair is that! I say we need time to tell our stories, too, right?"

Snow White – _looking very uncertain. - _"I guess that's true. All I really know is that one moment I was asleep and the next there was this really cute Prince leaning over and kissing me. And then he took off." _big sigh "_He was a very good kisser." _In exaggerated stage whisper she looks around and confides _"He made my toes curl! You have no idea what it's like to suddenly wake up after a long sleep to a strange man kissing you until your toes curl!"

Sleeping Beauty _pointing to self says sarcastically _- "Uhm, Sleeping Beauty, here? Yeah, actually, I do." _Turning to speak to Narrator - _"But she would know that if I were allowed to tell my story now wouldn't she?"

Narrator "I am sorry but the play is over." _waves script around - _"There is nothing else written here so it is time for everyone to go home."

Sleeping Beauty _now almost in tears - _"No, no, please don't go. We can write our own lines, we know our stories and whatever happens next, happens. Just please don't leave us in the woods, alone. It gets so dark here." _She sits down and begins to quietly cry._

Snow White - "Oh look what you've done you mean old woman! I can't stand it when someone else cries. it always makes me want to cry, too." _She suddenly flops down and begins to loudly sob._

_As both girls cry, the narrator is wildly waving the script around. _

Narrator _shouting_ - "It is over. We all have to go home. There ..."

Woodcutter _shouts in a loud voice_ - "Enough!"

_Sleeping Beauty looks up from crying and Narrator stops talking and looks over at Woodcutter while Snow White continues to sob into her hands. Woodcutter takes his axe and angrily chops a log in front of him making a loud thudding noise. Snow White finally looks up and slows her crying._

Woodcutter - "I said enough! You girls aren't the only ones left in the woods. My children, my Hansel and Gretal, were left in here, too. Besides, I didn't get any mention at all the last time. So you listen to me old lady, it is our time to tell our stories now."

Narrator - "That's all very well but as I keep saying the play is over. That's all the man had to say about this. So we should remain calm and leave quietly."

Sleeping Beauty - "No, it's remain calm and carry on. And that's exactly what we want to do, carry on with our story."

Narrator - "I don't know how to say this to get through to you, there - is - no - more - story!"

Woodcutter - "Yes - there -is. Now let me say this to get through to you. Remember what happened to the last Narrator?

Narrator _looking decisively uncomfortable_. - "Oh well, you would never, I mean really you.."

Woodcutter _interrupts her and waiving his axe menacingly says angrily - _"Oh yes I would. Now let's get on with it."

Narrator - "Alright, alright. I'll tell your stories even though I don't exactly know what will happen next or how it will turn out."

Sleeping Beauty -"Does anyone?"

Narrator _in a thoughtful tone_ - "Well I suppose you're right. OK let's get started again."

_Spotlights dim on Snow White while the Woodcutter leaves the stage completely (he slips behind his portion of the wood scenery to back stage) Sleeping Beauty is now in the bright spotlight. Narrator tosses her script back stage behind her, stands straight and after a big sigh begins again._

Narrator_ - "_Once upon a time there was a Queen who very much wanted a child. When she finally gave birth to a daughter the King was so happy he threw a great feast. He invited the whole town including the wise women. But he only had 12 gold plates and there were 13 wise women so one was not invited. At the feast, each wise woman gave the child spectacular presents but before the 12th wise woman came up, the 13th crashed the party. She was so angry and jealous over not being invited that she cursed the child. She said that on the child's 18th birthday she would prick her finger on an enchanted spindle and die. After saying this the 13th wise woman left.

"The King and Queen were devastated. But the 12th wise woman who had yet to give a gift came to them and said she can't undo the spell but she can make it better. So now instead of dying the Princess will fall into an enchanted sleep for 100 years and then will wake upon a kiss from a Prince. And so it happened just as predicted. The Princess, shortly after her 18th birthday, pricked her finger and fell asleep as did everyone in the castle. A large thorny briar grew around the castle protecting it. Then after 100 years a handsome prince got into the castle climbed the tower, kissed the princess and she woke."

_Spotlight dims a little on Narrator as _Sleeping Beauty _stands and begins to sing _

"People died people changed

Witches fought, Giants slained

While I slept, While I slept

"It's a different world, a different woods

I would have woke, if I could

Yet still I slept and I slept

The spell was kept

"Up the tower climbed my Prince

Then we kissed, haven't seen him since

no mistake, his kiss was good" _sighs_

"yet now he's left me in the woods"

_In regular voice she shouts happily - "_But I'm awake!" _then sings_

"Now it's my turn to live, to grow

What is next, I need to know

No more sleep, I'm awake

The world is mine for me to take

I'm awake, I'm awake!"

_Sleeping Beauty flings her arms wide out and freezes in place. After a few seconds spotlight dims on her and goes up on Snow White. When Narrator starts talking Sleeping Beauty slowly unfreeze_s and sits back down on boulder.

Narrator _now looking very bored - _"Once upon a time there lived a wicked Queen who had a magic mirror." _she_ _looks out into the audience and talks directly to them _"Must I, really? Is there anyone here who doesn't know Snow White's story? You know, mirror mirror on the wall, yadda yadda yadda, beautiful stepdaughter with skin as white as snow etcetera etcetera and so the evil Queen sends the huntsman to kill her, blah blah blah, while Queen goes mirror mirror, sees Snow White still alive and living with a bunch of dwarves, changes into old crone, poison apple, one bite, then Snow White sleeps. Dwarves build coffin with glass top, years pass, along comes a Prince, a kiss, she wakes up."

_Narrator turns and looks over at Snow White._

Snow White - "I guess that's right but they way you told Sleeping Beauty's story sounded a lot better than mine. But still, it's all true." T_hen still sitting she begins to sing_

_"People died people changed_

_Witches fought, Giants slained_

_While I slept, While I slept_

_"It's a different world a different woods_

_I would have woke, if I could_

_Yet still I slept and I slept_

_The spell was kept_

_"To my coffin rode my Prince_

_Then we kissed, haven't seen him since_

_no mistake, his kiss was good (sigh)_

_yet now he's left me in the woods"_

_"Now it's my turn to live, to grow_

_What is next, I need to know_

_No more sleep, I'm awake_

_The world is mine for me to take_

_I'm awake, I'm awake!"_

_She stands up as spotlight is also turned on Sleeping Beauty together they sing - _

"Now it's my turn to live, to grow

What is next, I need to know

No more sleep, I'm awake

The world is mine for me to take

I'm awake, I'm awake!"

_As they sing the last word Snow White flings her arms wide while Sleeping Beauty pumps the air with her fist. They freeze in these positions as they hold the last note for an extra two beats. Stage lights begin to slowly dim._

Narrator _sighs_ - "So, your story's been told and you're awake now. That's all well and good but from here on out you're on your own. I told all I know. What happens next is up to you." _Stage goes dark._

_End of Act One - Scene One_

**Act One Scene Two**

_**Stage setup**_

_Same forest backdrop as in Scene One. Narrator is sitting in her chair facing audience looking bored. Snow White is sitting on the pile of chopped logs in the middle of the stage while Sleeping Beauty is standing to the right of her. The two girls are initially trying to one up each other with their stories. Every time one mentions being kissed she sighs deeply. _

Snow White _in a curious gossipy tone _- "So you were kissed awake by a Prince, too?

Sleeping Beauty _archly_ - "Yes, his brother."

Snow White _egging her on _- "Was it a good kiss?"

Sleeping Beauty _sighing as she remembers the kiss _- Oh yes it was a really good kiss.

_Nods over at Narrator - "_So she said you were poisoned by an apple?"

Snow White _bragging tone _- "Yep. One bite and the next thing I knew I was in the middle of the woods in a coffin being kissed by a Prince." _sighs remembering kiss._

_Shakes her head and sounds confused. - "_It was all very strange. But it sure was a good kiss." _Sighs. Then with another shake continues._- "But what about you, how did you come to be asleep?"

Sleeping Beauty - "A prick."

Snow White - "A prick put you to sleep? Yeah, I heard that could happen."

Sleeping Beauty - "Not that kind of prick. A prick from an enchanted needle on a spindle. Although I suppose you could say a prick woke me"

Snow White _confused_ - "A needle woke you?"

Sleeping Beauty _a bit irritated _- "No, Prince Charming woke me."

Snow White _sadly_ _- _"Now I am confused."

Sleeping Beauty _trying to be patient - "_A poisoned needle put me to sleep and Prince Charming woke me but he turned out to be a real prick. Sure he was handsome and charming and man could he kiss. S_ighs and remembers his kiss. - "_But he was also very married."

Snow White _incredulously_ - "No! Really? You're very own prince, married? That's just awful!" _in voice dripping with sympathy - _"Oh, you poor thing"

Sleeping Beauty _angrily _- "Don't you 'poor thing' me! Your own Prince Charming was married, too."

Snow White _indignant_ - "Why that's just mean. He couldn't be. Sure he left me here in the woods but he said he'd be back some day..." _voice trails off as it sinks in._

Sleeping Beauty _a bit maliciously _- "And he had children, twins, even."

Snow White - "Why, that that.."

Sleeping Beauty _together - "_That prick?"

Snow White – "Yes, that prick!"

_Music starts up in slow tempo and Snow White and Sleeping Beauty sing:_

"I thought it was love from the very first kiss

That he was the one, my true love, my Prince

He seemed like a happily ever after kind of guy

One who'd love me and cherish me and be by my side

But it turned out to be just a kiss, just a kiss

"Now imagine my shock to discover his wife

My Prince already had his own married life

That I was just a girl who he woo'd and left

Leaving me alone in the woods, distraught and bereft

And there went my chance to be a wife, his wife

"So now I know sometimes a kiss is just a kiss

That a Prince can be a bastard and still be a Prince

And a girl left in the woods needs to be smart

To be careful and cautious and protect her heart

And remember that sometimes it's just a kiss

And I'm still a Miss..."

Snow White - "Buy there are some good men. My dwarves were all very nice to me. I mean they took me in and let me stay with them when I had nowhere else to go."

Sleeping Beauty - "Well, that was very nice of them." _dirty laugh - _"I guess no problems about any hanky panky with dwarves, right?"

Snow White _giggling _- "Oh my heavens, no. I don't think that's even possible. I mean, you do know that they're really short, don't you?"

Sleeping Beauty _sarcastically _- "Uhm, yes, I sort of figured that since they were dwarves."

Snow White _knowingly _- "In fact I think they sort of thought of me as their Mom."

Sleeping Beauty _confused _- "Their mother?"

Snow White _nodding head and uses explaining tone _- "Why yes, their mother. Sure they were all pretty old but since they were so short then I was as tall as a mother would be to her sons." _giggling _- "OK, sons with white beards and wrinkly faces! But still, I did just about everything a mother would do. I made their beds, did their laundry, cleaned their house, cooked their meals, washed the dishes, did the gardening and mended their clothes, just like a mother."

Sleeping Beauty _dryly_ - "Sounds more like a slave than a mother. They did pay you for all that work, didn't they?"

Snow White _indignantly _- "Well of course not, silly! You wouldn't pay a mother would you? Besides Doc said." _stops and looks around then hurriedly adds _"wait, I didn't say that!"

Sleeping Beauty _confused _- "Say what?"

Snow White _relieved_ - "Oh good. You didn't hear that. You see Doc, No! No! No!

_shaking her head _- "You see it was Prancer, yes, Prancer who told me that names have power. And the dwarfs names are very powerful. So D.. no Prancer told me I can use their real names in their house and cave but once in the real world I have to use their other made up names."

Sleeping Beauty _thoughtfully _- "Actually I have heard that terrible things can happen to people who use the dwarves real names in public. But you said one of them now goes by the name of Prancer. Really? Prancer? Is he gay"

Snow White - "No, he wasn't Happy or uhm gay. He was, wait, you know I can't say. You're doing this to just get me confused. And in trouble."

Sleeping Beauty _laughing _- "Oh but it is so much fun! So the rest of these dwarves, let me guess is one Dancer and another Donner?"

Snow White - "Exactly!"

Sleeping Beauty _incredulously _- "Really? Now I was teasing!"

Snow White - "Well they said that since people confused their names anyway they might as well use those names in public. So yes, outside of their kingdom the seven dwarves are called Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Comet, Cupid Donner and Blitzen."

Sleeping Beauty _dryly _- "Let me guess, they called you Vixen?"

Snow White _surprised _- "How did you know that? Do you know the dwarves, too? Well no, you said you didn't, didn't you? And of course in addition to the dwarves, there is also Rudy, now."

Sleeping Beauty - "Rudy, as in Rudolph?"

Snow White - "Why of course. He's someone they took in, just like me. But what about you? Don't you have a castle you could go back home to now? I mean, didn't she" _pointing to Narrator sitting in her chair"_Narrator _rolls eyes at audience and crosses her arms_ "say that the whole castle fell asleep when you pricked your finger and then woke up when you were kissed?

Sleeping Beauty - _glares at back of Narrator _"Actually she left that most of that part out. But yes, that is exactly what happened."

Snow White - "So you could go home to your castle now. Or are you embarrassed to tell them your Prince was married."

Sleeping Beauty _starts pacing around Snow White _- "Well, I really do hate the thought of telling my mother that! There I was chasing deep into the woods after my Prince only to learn he had married a girl who had run away from him! I think there is a lesson somewhere in there but I'm not sure what it is." _Stops pacing, - "_And won't my mother love hearing that my Prince, _**my Prince**_, was married! But I can't tell her. "

Snow White _eager to hear good gossip _"Why can't you tell her? Will she beat you?"

Sleeping Beauty _aghast _- "No she won't beat me. I can't tell her because she's not there!"

Snow White _nodding wisely _- "Oh so she ran away, too."

Sleeping Beauty - _impatient/angry _- "No she didn't run away! The whole castle is gone!"

Snow White - "Huh?"

Sleeping Beauty - "Look, by the time I found out my Prince Charming was married, I had gone far into the woods. I thought I knew the way back home but when I got back to the castle it was gone."

Snow White - "Gone? How can a castle be gone?"

Sleeping Beauty - "I don't know. It just wasn't there. I guess somehow my parents and everyone in the castle moved on while I was away."

Snow White _hesitantly _- "Oh, yes, I see. I've heard that happens sometimes. I guess you really can't go home again, can you?"

Sleeping Beauty - "Exactly. You go away and expect everything to remain the same but it doesn't. People move on. Castles, too. And you're left on your own."

Snow White _happily_ - "You're not on your own. You have me, now."

Sleeping Beauty _standing behind Snow White, unsure if she should be sarcastic or nice, nice wins out _- "Thank you Snow. It's nice to have a friend when you're left alone in the woods."

_End of Act One - Scene Two_

**Act One Scene Three**

**_Stage setup: _**_Snow White and Sleeping Beauty sitting together in front of the chopped logs. Same woods backdrop._

Sleeping Beauty – "I guess maybe we should move on. Perhaps we should go so your dwarves."

Snow White – "Well we could always ask Harvey what he thinks we should do."

Sleeping Beauty - "Harvey? Who's Harvey?"

Snow White - "Why Harvey's my Huntsman. You know the one who took me into the woods and was supposed to kill me but let me go instead?"

Sleeping Beauty - "Yes, yes, I know all that. But you made it sound as if he is still around."

Snow White - "Well that's because he is still around, silly. After my Prince Charming left me in the woods I didn't know what to do. So I asked the birds."

Sleeping Beauty - "You asked the birds?"

Snow White - "Yes I asked the birds. They're a lot smarter than people think they are. Anyway, they told me that Harvey was nearby and they took me to him. But Harvey's changed..."

Sleeping Beauty - "I don't care if Harvey's changed. Don't you know what this means? He's a Huntsman so he can hunt and get us food! Food! Oh my God! I haven't eaten in over 100 years! And you've gone, what? Twenty thirty years since you took that bite of the apple? Aren't you starving, too? Quick call Harvey. Just think, he can shoot us a deer, and you know how to cook and oh I think I'm drooling, just thinking of deer steak's and deer meat for dinner. Or a bear, greasy bear meat. Mmmmmmm... I don't even care if it's just a couple of rabbits, nice dark juicy bunny meat. Oh please quick call Harvey!"

Snow White - "Wow. You're kind of scary like this. Look, I'll call Harvey for you, but he really has changed. So don't say I didn't warn you.." _calling in loud voice _"Harvey! Harvey!"

Sleeping Beauty _begins calling frantically _- "Harvey, Harvey!"

To be continued…..


End file.
